There are still so many things that happen that you just don't hear about. So I have put together a list of things from my own experience that I wish I knew on my natural birth journey and after.
Hey, my Britzie's. I hope you are all great and winning at life! As anyone that has been reading my blog would know, I had my daughter naturally, and whenever this comes up in conversation it is always followed by a list of questions or shared stories about personal experiences. What I have learnt from all these encounters is that there are still so many things that happen that you just don't hear about. So I have put together a list of things from my own experience that I wish I knew on my natural birth journey and after. Happy reading my loves.
1. It is totally OK to be scared.
Have you ever listened to someone's birth story and it sounded like they were calm and had it all together and everything went so smoothly... So you don't want to speak about the fact that you are terrified about having your baby. No, it does not mean that you're not strong enough or that you're not ready! It is actually very normal. When I planned to have natural birth I was completely freaking out about it. The thing about a natural birth plan is that you don't know what to expect or when to expect it. You find yourself questioning EVERYTHING it is okay.
2. Your water does not break the way it does in the movies.
So we all expect this dramatic gush of water which results in a puddle at our feet to know that our water has broken, yeah that does not happen. Now many women have their version of their water breaking in my case my water did not break at all. I knew I was in labor because my contractions were really strong and after timing them I knew that I needed to make my way to the hospital. Bottom line, have no expectations, things happen differently for everyone.
3. It can all get pretty uncomfortable pretty fast.
I think we all expect to have our vaginas on display during childbirth so you kind of prepare yourself for that. What you don't prepare yourself for is having multiple people sticking their fingers up there to check how far you have dilated. Since I had my baby in a state hospital there wasn't just one doctor that would come and check on me and stick his fingers up there, it was the doctor, nurse 1 and nurse 2, it was also the student doctor and her supervisor. It is not something you just get used to because it is so uncomfortable because it can hurt but after a while, your mind becomes occupied with just about everything else and you don't care anymore. Unfortunately, it is necessary and part of the process so just breathe and try and relax through it.
4. It's okay for things to not go according to plan.
In my birth story, I mentioned that I did not want to get an epidural. I just kept telling myself that there are so many moms that did it without any pain medication so I could do it too. I let myself suffer for a while but my pain was unbearable. I felt like I was breaking in half and I gave in and asked for the epidural. Now I still don't know if it was the epidural or the lack of eating or something else but my blood pressure dropped extremely low and my baby went into distress. The doctor was concerned and said she thought it would be best to have a c-section. I was obviously freaking out, this was not the plan but I quickly calmed myself down and realized that I needed to do what was best for my baby. As you would know the plan changed again but I just decided to trust my body and my baby and at the end of the day we all made it out okay.
5. The contractions might be the worst part.
A lot of you might be like whaaaat? Yes, I know that just the thought of a watermelon forcing its way out of your doughnut can sound pretty horrific but it might not be the worst part. For some moms, their contractions start out feeling like period pain and for others including myself, it was hell from the beginning. When you're going through those contractions you think that the actual birth is going to be something out of mission impossible but surprisingly it is not. I have to be honest though and say that I have no idea if it would have been the same without an epidural. All I felt was an urge to push and when my babies head was ready to pop out it felt like there was a lot of pressure by my vagina, I also have no idea if the pain would not be too bad if you tear since I did not but they did cut me, it hurt a little, but like I said the contractions were much worse.
6. Pooping and the after birth.
Okay so I just decided to add this bit because some women know this but there are surprisingly a lot of women who don't. You might shit yourself while giving birth and this is completely normal. You might not even know that it has happened because the nurses are so used to it that you won't get any sort of reaction from them. I'm sure your partner would tell you though if he is in the room with you. Honestly, I wish that was the case for me, I ended up pushing out a hemorrhoid which the nurse very casually pushed back, so awkward! The other thing I wanted to add was the delivery of the placenta. Nope just having the baby is not the end of it, again I have to add that I don't know if it was not painful for me because of the epidural or if it just doesn't hurt.
7. Sitting and walking hurts for a while
It might be caused by the stitches or just by having a natural birth but sitting down and walking was super uncomfortable for about a week after giving birth because everything was super swollen down there. I have heard lots of moms complaining about it being uncomfortable for much longer than I week but I had the disposable ice packs that you can put in your underwear. They are just meant for hemorrhoids so they don't get too cold but it is heaven and you will notice a difference from the first use. I know Pinterest also has a few tips on making something similar called padsicles (Quick tip from a video I watched on YouTube, put them in the fridge and not freezer or it's too cold).
8. You will Pee yourself when you laugh or sneeze for a while after you had your baby
Honey, it really does not matter how many kegel exercises you have done before you had your baby. Trust me when I say for at least a week or two after you will pee yourself a little when you laugh or sneeze. If it lasts longer than three months and you constantly having issues go and get it checked out because it could be that your bladder dropped a little when you gave birth. This happened to me and I only found out afterward that it is pretty normal with natural birth.
9. And then comes the other swelling
If you had swelling during your pregnancy then I'm sorry to tell you this but that might not be the end of it. Now I'm not 100% sure if this happens to everyone but about two days after I had my little one I had so much swelling on my wrists and ankles. It lasted for about two days but I've spoken to other moms who said that their swelling lasted a little longer so if it happens don't freak out it's totally normal.
10. Sex hurts afterward
Yes, I said it. I had a baby I'm pretty sure everyone knows I have sex! I think for all moms giving yourself time is super easy because it is the last thing that you are interested in but it's going to happen at some point after and I don't think it matters how long you wait but it really hurts. It doesn't hurt forever though.
So there you have it ladies or gents if your curiosity got the better of you.
Much love my Britzie's XOXO
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